While I was in line to pick up at the Submarine Preschool, I overheard the extremely young perky room mom fretting about how the year’s party parent sign up slots were not all filled up. Figuring that I really don’t need all of those 8 hours a week to get the shopping, managing, organizing, calling, cooking, cleaning and atom splitting done, I immediately had a psychotic break offered some help.
Me: (innocently) Oh! Put me down for whatever.
Perky Room Mom: Great! You can bring the snack for the Halloween Party.
Me: Uh. Ok. What do I bring?
PRM: Whatever you want. You don’t even have to bring drinks or paper products. Just snack.
Me: Umm… Cupcakes?
PRM: There is supposed to be something healthy and then something non-healthy.
Me: Non-healthy? Like… paint thinner? (Luckily I didn’t say the paint thinner part out loud. I know, I was really surprised, too!) So I am bringing two snacks? (False advertising, much?)
PRM: Yup. But no drinks. They will only serve water. No juice.
At this point I start a rant about how preschool without juice is like tequila without lime, coffee without Bailey’s or- why are all my go-togethers alcoholic? My rant was tolerated by those in line, but clearly not enjoyed by anyone but me. Luckily, I enjoyed it enough for everyone. On the way out the door, PRM asked whose mom I was. “Pumpkin Pie’s”, I said. There are THREE Pumpkin Pies in his class, let her figure it out.
Pumpkin Pie and I made it home and I told about the Halloween party snacks. I am not sure why I told him, did I think he would offer to handle it himself?
Me: (Faking excitement) Pumpkin Pie, we get to bring the snack to your Halloween Party at school!!
Pumpkin Pie: CUPCAKES!!! (That’s my boy!)
Me: That’s what I said! BUT, we have to bring something healthy, too.
Pumpkin Pie: GREEN BEANS!
Me: Oh. Uh, How about fruit? Fruit is a healthy snack.
Pumpkin Pie: LIMES! I love limes because they are tart and Pickles and I LOVE tart stuff!
Me: Oh. Uh… Ok.
I guess the Submarine Preschool is having cupcakes and Green Bean Lime Casserole for Halloween snack. I better go get my cook book.