Last week at Camp Mamaw, I discovered something
disturbing about myself. It all started with Grey’s Anatomy. This Summer I became hooked on Grey’s Anatomy. I am catching up on all the old episodes (Thanks to Lifetime, TV for
ovaries Women). For me it is the perfect turn-the-brain-off and look-at-the-pretty-people entertainment for after the shorties are in bed. I have watched enough that I have convinced myself I am a competent surgeon. I even offered to remove my niece, Skittle’s tonsils for her (she declined, big chicken). I record Grey’s Anatomy (and anything else I happen to watch) on our DVR. The beauty of this of course, is that I can watch whenever they leave me alone for 45 minutes I want to and zip through all the commercials. I hit the magic skip-ahead-30-seconds button a few times and I am on my way back to McDreamy and Meredith’s latest relationship drama. It’s all good.
Last week at Camp Mamaw, I had no control over what was on tv. This was fine, because there are lots of other things to do, and the Elder Mulders would probably talk during Grey’s Anatomy and I can’t have that. But, when the kids were in bed and the grown ups all sat down with a glass of wine in front of the tube, something happened that I was not expecting. I was overwhelmed with the desire to buy stuff! Ooh! I really have to have a smart phone! How do I not have a Snuggee already? I totally need a new GPS. I can’t believe I have lived this long without Bose Noise Cancelling Headphones? I think it would be a really good idea to spend $1300 on a new 46″ HDTV. I simply must go to Kohl’s tomorrow morning at 3am! I was on a total manic mental shopping binge. But, why?
Slowly it dawned on me that this was the day
before Thanksgiving and retailers were going full court press to get me out at 3am on Black Friday to buy crap
that I don’t need. I hadn’t seen commercials for ages (Thank you, DVR. I love you even more than I thought possible.) and I had completely forgotten that they existed to, you know, like, sell me stuff! I had lost my advertising immunity! Gone! I was like a 6 year old kid again watching commercials for Cathy Quick Curl or Baby Alive, Except now I have a credit card! (I never did get Cathy Quick Curl and I never got over it, either).
I suppose this isn’t a scientific study, but in case you were wondering, it takes approximately 6 months of not watching commercials to completely lose the immunity built up over 30 years of repeated exposure. Now you know. So if you are used to the DVR, don’t watch commercial television without some sort of supervision. Or freeze your Visa in a block of ice so you can’t see the numbers. Now if you’ll excuse me, Derek and Meredith need me to assist on a cutting edge surgery. Stat.