Holy Crapola! Part 2: Finding Home

This is a auto transmission. Ours was probably dirtier than this picture shows. And broken, of course.

So, our 2002 Mazda MPV with 99,995 miles on it no longer had a functioning transmission.  This happened on an out of town trip on Christmas day.  It was slightly less than awesome.

After we got all the people, dog, presents and luggage back to Camp Mamaw (thanks to Mamaw, my mom, and Unca) and had a Mimosa or two, it was time to figure out what the hell we were going to do! have Christmas!  Yay Christmas!  I will admit, I had a little trouble focusing.

Saturday: Obviously there was nothing we could do about our van stranded at the Wawa on Christmas.  We guessed we would have to handle it the next day.  Oh, that’s right.  The day after Christmas is Sunday.  Good luck finding a shop open on Sunday, Dec 26th.  Ok, so we will handle that on Monday.  Wait!  We were planning to go home on Monday.  Crap.  Crappity crap crap.  You know what would have made this even more obnoxious?  If a snowstorm were coming.  Wait..  That’s right!  A snowstorm WAS coming.  Mmmm hmmmm.  Truly sucktackular.

I must have talked to one of the guys in the back. I knew something was up when he said his name was "Gonzo". Seriously? I am renting a car from a Muppet?

Sunday: I got online on Sunday (because, miraculously, the internet was not closed for the holiday) to find that it was not possible to rent a van online for a one-way trip that did not involve an airport.  Unfortunately, all the airports were inconveniently located an hour+ away from both destinations.  After 8 calls to 3 different car rental companies (with call centers in Gurgaon, India, no doubt) I found a Sport Utility Vehicle that was available.  Sold!  I mean, rented!  Of course I had to pay in advance and the cancellation period ended an hour before I rented, but whatever, at least I knew we could get home.  Unless it snowed.  Crap.  Where was that snow headed again?  Wait, what?!  They are predicting 2 feet of snow in Philly? But that’s where we need to go!!!  Wraaahhhhhhhhh!

Monday: Christmas fun was over, the fighting between the brothers was approaching critical and the snow had pretty much finished falling.  Not much snow at Camp Mamaw, and Our Town wound up with a little less than a foot.  Per Gwen, the plows were through it by midday, no problem.  Van was towed to Mamaw and Dat’s beloved mechanic, Doc.  Doc is beloved because he sends Dat a birthday card every year.  That is how we choose mechanics on Cloud 8, so suck it.

Around the time the snow plows were finishing up, Doc called to say that we had two choices and both of them were expensive and sucky.  Time for a new van.  And by new, I mean new to us.  For you optimists, yes, it is very exciting to have a new van.  For those of you who are more like me pessimists out there, paying for a new van sucks eggs.  We knew we needed a new van sometime soon, but were hoping for 2 more years.  Too bad for us.  Let the car payments begin!  But first, we needed to figure out what to do with Broken Van and get home before Camp Mamaw had to be condemned.

The plans were laid.  We were picking up the rental the next morning, packing it to the gills and driving to the borg that is Northern Virginia to see some more people we love and celebrate Christmas.  Then onward home!

Wallace and Gromit provided us with 2 solid hours of near quiet on the cozy ride home. It was like all three boys were on one couch with the dog. Wearing seatbelts.

Tuesday: We were sorta packed up the night before, so we got up a little early and got dressed to go out to breakfast.  As we were putting on our coats as quietly as 3 howler monkeys and 2 regular people can possible so not to wake the other 5 people in the house, Husband turns to me and says, Oh sh**.  How are we going to get to breakfast?  We don’t. have. a. car. Whoopsie!  The only visible car keys were for the 4-seater Punch Bug, so I  woke up Husband’s sister, WooWoo to borrow her car.  Thanks, WooWoo!

We breakfasted, picked up the small-ish rental SUV and headed back to Camp to pack up and move out.  We managed to squeeze most (sorry about the cool keyboard, Pickles, we’llget it ASAP!!)of our Christmas swag and luggage in the way back and the 3 boys (one of whom was in a booster) and 1 Doodle Dog in the back seat of the Ford Whateveritwas for the 4-5 hour drive home.  I don’t recommend it.  Despite 2 solid hours of Wallace and Gromit there was arguing.  And crying.  The boys were unhappy, too.  But, we made it home and that was good.  Now to figure out what we are going to drive besides our 18-year-old Honda sedan.  But first, I need to rest my brain.

Photo Credits:  Outsourced and Wallace and Gromit from Wikipedia.
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About Adventures From Cloud 8

I am a stay at home mom who now and again sneaks away to be an in-home family therapist. My husband and I have 3 boys: Sweet Pea (12), Pickles (9) and Pumpkin Pie (4). Oh yeah. We have Doodle Dog, too. You guessed it! He’s a boy. At least he pees outside.
This entry was posted in Brother Rivalry, Car breaks down, Christmas, Funny Parenting Blog, traveling with kids and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Holy Crapola! Part 2: Finding Home

  1. Faith says:

    YIKES. Well, on the plus side, you will count this as a treasured Christmas memory in ten or twenty years. Possibly thirty.

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