The awesome Kate and Lydia at Rants from Mommyland (which I insist you read obsessively, like me) did a funny post about Rule #1 in their houses. I couldn’t resist asking that loaded question here at Cloud 8. This is what I got.

This is one reason you should go immediately and buy all the George and Martha books you can carry. You can see George off to the side peeking through the window at Martha while she is in the tub. That naughty George.
Pumpkin Pie: Rule #1 is not to peek at someone in the tub.
Me: Really? That’s the most important rule?
Pumpkin Pie: Yup, but I did peek at someone in the tub once.
Me: You did? Who?
Pumpkin Pie: I can’t remember his name.
So when Sweet Pea and Pickles got home, of course I had to ask them the same question, but since they are so grown up, they gave boring answers..
Me: What’s rule #1 at our house?
Sweet Pea: What did I do?
Me: Nothing. I just want to know.
Sweet Pea: Seriously. What did I do?
Me: I swear, there is no wrong answer.
Sweet Pea(still suspicious): Okaaaaaaay. Don’t lie? No, I was going to say don’t jump out the window, but that’s too obvious. Can I go back to my movie now?
Me: Yes, please.
Pragmatic Pickles’ turn. After much cajoling, he was only able to come up with super-boring stuff.
Me: What’s rule #1 at our house?
Pickles: I don’t know.
Me: What’s the most important rule?
Pickles: Seriously, I don’t know.
Me: For Pete’s sake, just pick one.
Pickles: Wipe your feet. And close the door.
Me: Booooorrrriiiiiiiing.
Pickles: Can I go now?

This is what Martha did when George peeked at her in the tub. You would think she would at least throw on a robe before she overturned her bathtub onto George's head, but whatever. Rock on, Martha.
Me: Yes, please.
Evidently Rule #1 is to maintain the appearance of innocence at all times. And don’t commit to any rules. Except not peeking at people while they’re in the bathtub unless you don’t know them and they it’s okay. Duh. But don’t peek at Martha, she will destroy you. Just ask George.
I can’t stick to one, but our big ones right now: 1. Listen to mommy and daddy, 2. Keep pee and poop in the potty and 3. NO biting!!!
So you guys are *totally* allowed to peek at people in the tub? How bohemian.
Good news! Sweet Pea and Pickles are going to grow up to be stars in a TBS sitcom about two brothers who grow up to be lawyers and form a wacky practice!!! Or possibly actually lawyers! Just that being a lawyer on TV is so much more glamorous than being a lawyer in real life (;
Can you tell I’ve seen about 578397530290 Franklin and Bash promos since the NBA finals started?
Finally! I always wanted to be a stage mom!